Hey guys,
It has been awhile.I doubt anyone would read this since its a forgotten blog.
I write to vent my anger and also some thoughts.
Just so you know I'm alive and kicking just really pissed at myself.
Anyway, I've been trying to be a good boy, kinda like finishing up assignments and with a whole lot of commitments that I should just neglect instead.
Just remembered about a few forgotten assignments that will bloody cost me a few percent about 15% plus. FYI this module is 5 or 6 credits so ouch there goes my GPA. I still don't understand how Mechanical systems can be a real estate's business course core module. WHAT THE HECK.

I never did understand this God's grace that was given so freely for us or at least for me, and I still don't.
Someone reminded me that I can never understand this grace until something goes really wrong with my life. It's kinda true cause we've been living in such comfort and luxury, that we've taken this grace for granted. So much so that as Christians we don't even behave like we have received this grace.
I don't really know how to put it in words but seeing God alive in my life a few times wasn't enough. In another words I'm thirsty for God to see what He have in stored for me I just don't have the determination to seek Him.

Every single time i try, never once am I not distracted by my surroundings like mostly people and cars.
I think i need something to burst my pride bubble. I need a really sharp needle to poke my ass so that i can think, remember and not judge.
Oh yeah people around me will know that i am forgetful. so forgive me =)
and I really pray that God will give me a mind that will help me to remember.
i don't want to be 1 minute Tom or something.

I really pray that this will be put into action like get myself a planner and organize myself.
I've been really cranky(short-tempered or retarded), blame the weather bla bla bla. yeah that's life and I've never learn how to actually say from the bottom of my heart that my life rules. =(

Xavier have decided to follow Jesus and be changed. Please pray for me =)
I am gonna study like I've never before. remind me to =) haha

alright night guys
sleeping time.